Love Is Like Heaven, But It Hurts Like Hell
by ILuvMyAngelOfMusic
Summary: Arthur is like a father to Julia, when their finally reunited, Julia is the happiest person in the world. But there is one other knight who can make Julia's life even happier. LancelotOC story
1. Chapter 1

Alrighty this is one of my fist fan-fics, trying my hardest. This chapter is mainly a 'history' lesson about the character. It'll DEFINATLY pick up in the next chapter. If you dont like it tell me, so I can write something else, if you like it then tell me, so I can continue this story! Thank u much!

Chapter 1

My name is Julia. I had been waiting in this village for two months now. Two long months. Waiting. Hoping. Praying that 'he' would ride through this village, see me, and take me away from all the horrible memories I have inside of me. I guess I better start at the beginning:

I grew up with my mother and step-father in a little village in Britain. My father died while my mother was pregnant with me, I have yet to find out how he died, no one seems to know, or they just won't tell me.

Anyway, life was always hard for me, my mother was unhappy with the new man in her life, and so was I. He was abusive, drunk all of the time, and wanted to rule/overpower everything and everyone. I was beaten many times, so was my mother.

When I was 7 years old I tried to run away from home. I ran into the forest behind our village and was ambushed and captured by Woads. I was there for exactly two days, the worst two days of my life. They tortured me, I tried to tell them I wasn't Roman and meant them no harm, I mean, I was only 7 how could I be a threat to them?! They didn't believe me. I was close to death on the second day, from all of the beating. Then I heard it, hoof beats. I don't remember much, just being swept on the back of a horse and a man holding me and taking me away from the Woads. Later in the forest I found out his name was Arthur, a young knight, who happened to ride through our village, and heard about me disappearing, my mother begged him to find me, which he did. And that was when Arthur became my hero and replacement 'father'.

He was gone a lot, being a knight and all, but he would visit me whenever he could. He taught me how to swordfight, shoot a bow and arrow, and to ride. With him around my step-father would not dare touch me. Arthur knew about my step-father abusing me, and told me one day, when he was free, he would take me away, but for now I would have to stay with my mother and step-father in our little village. This thought gave me hope, and kept me fighting.

The last time I saw Arthur was when I was ten years old. He had brought me back a young black stallion, so I could perfect my riding skills, and stop riding the donkey I had always practiced on. I named him 'Rhaebus', or 'Ray' for short.

That was the last time I saw Arthur, he had to leave for a mission and said he would return shortly, but he never did. I knew he was still alive, I heard great tales from him about many battles he had fought and won. But for some reason he never came back.

When I turned twelve things got from bad to worse. My mother died, so it was just me and my step-father. He took advantage of this. I was locked in a tiny room in our cottage, beaten regularly, and raped occasionally. The only comfort I had was Rhaebus, whom I was allowed to keep, for reasons unknown to me. Ray was so much like me; he didn't trust anyone, except for me of course. After five years of this hell, I had finally stolen enough food and supplies to run away. One night I picked the lock in my 'prison' (which I had done many times before to sneak out and steal food) saddled Ray, grabbed a sword Arthur had given me years ago and rode off.

That is how I got here, in this village somewhere near the Great Wall. After I ran away I didn't know where to go. I decided to find the only person that ever cared for me, Arthur. I had heard rumors that him and his knights were due to come through this village any day now, that was two months ago. Here I am, seventeen years old, my food supply is running low, and I am sick of sleeping on dirt roads in the village and taking baths in a dirty lake. Yet I waited, hoping he would come, and then one day it happened.

I was asleep; I was dreaming about hoof beats…it took me a while to realize I wasn't dreaming. I jumped up and ran out of the alleyway I had been sleeping in, then I saw him: Arthur and many other knights. He had gotten off of his horse and was letting it drink out of the nearby lake (my bath tub).

I slowly walked over to him. He had aged, yes, but he still had the kind strong features in his face I remembered from so long ago. I was about ten feet away when he looked up and noticed me.

I stopped and he stared. He looked at me like I was a ghost, like he wanted to run away screaming. He walked a step towards me and said, "Julia? Is it really you? No, it can't be." He recognized me! I was so happy that he hadn't forgotten about me. "Yes, yes it is me."

A huge wave of happiness came over me as I ran towards him and hugged him he held me and kept repeating "No it can't be. How is this possible? God has answered my prayers."

I let go of him and looked up into his kind face, tears streaming down my face, he wiped them away. "I was told you died, that you killed yourself, I even went to your funeral!" he said to me. A funeral? Killed myself? What the heck was going on here?

"Died, funeral, who told you that? How? What?" I was so confused I really wasn't making any sense.

That was when he told me everything, "You must have been around 12 when your step-father sent me a letter saying you had killed yourself, I then went to your village immediately, of course I didn't believe him, but when I got there you were nowhere to be found, and all I saw was a mound on the ground with your name on it. I had truly believed that I had failed you and you had given up on me and killed yourself."

So that was why my step-father kept me locked up. I told Arthur about this, and he was angry at himself for not searching our cottage so many years ago, at my 'funeral'. I really didn't care anymore, all those horrible years meant nothing, I was finally with the only man who ever cared for me.

alrighty decided to end the first chapter here, Lancelot will come in the next chapter, trust me! It'll me lots of drama and love, I am trying not to make it TOO mary-sueish...but I think it might turn out that way :p...bear with me...review and the next chapter will be here VERY shortly!


	2. Chapter 2

Yaaa!! 2 reviews already! Thank u guys sooo much u made me want to continue this story!!! Yaa! Lol!

Sweet A.K: She is 17, it does mention it in the story…somewhere….but you're right I should have made it a little more obvious…it gets a little complicated with the ages and stuff!..lol! Thank u soo much 4 ur review!

Katemary77: Thank u too for ur review! It makes me happy to know people like my story! I'll try to keep it going! Here's another chapter, hope you like! :p

To ALL reviewers: plz write me after each chapter I update…just so I know people are still reading it and liking it…I don't want to write a story no one reads! So after u read it just give me a quick review and the third chapter will be here soon! Luv Yall soo much! Lol XOXO!

Chapter 2

Arthur told me I couldn't have found him at a better time. He was on his way to get his discharge papers. And he asked me if I wanted to go to Rome with him after he got them. I said yes right away and hugged him again. I was happier than I had been in years...heck, I was happier than I had been my ENTIRE life!

"So you'll do it? You'll come to Rome with me?" he asked me again, just to make sure.

"There's nothing I'd rather do!" I replied.

"So it is settled then, you'll ride to Hadrian's Wall with me, to pick up my discharge papers, and then we'll go to Rome. I will be able to introduce you to my mentor Pelagius." And with that he took my hand and led me over to introduce me to his fellow knights.

"Knights, this here is Julia, the daughter I never had, but always wanted. I have told you all many things about her. Her death was a lie of her step-fathers, trying to keep us apart, but as you can see, that didn't work."

The 6 knights stood before me. I felt like a deer in headlights (author's note: not sure if they had that saying 'back in the day' but I am using it anyway :p), they were all looking at me; I didn't know what to say.

Arthur finally broke the awkward silence, "Julia this is Tristan…"

He was the first knight in the 'line-up'. He had long black hair, some of it was braided, and a long beard. He also had a tattoo on one of his cheeks; I couldn't make out what it was. He took my hand and shook it lightly and let go very quickly. He said something like 'Nice to meet you'; I couldn't quite make it out. I had a feeling he was a quiet person who kept to himself a lot, I liked him already!

"…Bors and Dragonet…" Arthur said as he introduced me to two very tough looking knights. The one called Dragonet was slightly taller than Bors, but both were very strong built and had no hair. The scars on their faces made them look even more threatening, but both smiled at me and shook my hand gently.

"…Galahad and Gawain…" Gawain had blonde hair and a beard, he reminded me of a 'lighter' version of Tristan, but, as I later found out, he was not the quiet person who kept to himself. Galahad had to be the youngest of the knights, even though his dark hair and beard didn't make him look like it.

After saying hello to Galahad and Gawain Arthur said, "…and this here is Lancelot."

Arthur had always told me many tales of Lancelot, his best friend, when I was little, and by his appearance most of the stories had to have been true. He was tall and very well built. His worn armor and swords, which he carried on his back, revealed that he had been in many battles. He had dark curly hair, a short beard, and dark eyes. He gently took my hand and kissed it, the entire time not taking his eyes away from mine.

"I see Arthur didn't lie about your beauty, only he told me about some pretty little girl, when you are a gorgeous grown woman. I look forward to getting to know you, milady."

Wow, what's a girl to say to that?! I mean, I didn't think I was ugly, but I certainly didn't think I was gorgeous either. I had long blonde hair, that hadn't been brushed in far too long, blue eyes, I was skinny from the small amounts of food I had been eating the last two months, and the beige dress I was wearing was torn in many places. I didn't think I was a very pretty sight.

Then, putting me out of my trance, Arthur spoke, "Now that we have all been properly introduced, I think it is best that we make haste, the bishop's carriage has to be around here somewhere, and we want to make sure he gets to Hadrian's Wall safely."

"No, we want to make sure our discharge papers make it to the wall safely," said Bors with a bark-like laugh. The rest of the knights laughed and then went to mount their horses.

I looked over into the alleyway I had been sleeping in and whistled. Seconds later Rhaebus was cantering towards me.

"I see you still have the young stallion I gave you." Arthur said with a smile; I nodded 'yes'.

I gave Ray a pat as he stood prancing and tossing his head next to me. I walked him over to the nearest log and jumped on his back. I had to sell the saddle and bridle to buy food. So now I was riding him with nothing but a halter and lead rope. The only possession I had left was the sword I had on my back, which was the only thing I couldn't bear to sell.

Arthur looked at me as if asking if I was ready to go, and I just gave him a quick nod. He then kicked his horse into a smooth gallop and the rest of us followed. We galloped for I don't know how long, before we stopped on top of a hill overlooking the bishop's carriage.

"As promised, the bishops carriage," said Gawain.

"Our freedom Bors" (Galahad)

"Hmm, I can almost taste it…" Bors replied.

We all let out a laugh, and then suddenly it happened. The carriage was attacked by Woads. Just seeing them made my body shake with anger. The Romans were trying to fight them off, but they weren't being very successful.

"Woads!" Tristan yelled.

"Stay here," Lancelot yelled at me, but I was already galloping towards the carriage, sword held high, and ready to get my revenge.

The other knights were all behind me; Lancelot gave up yelling for me not to fight.

I reached the carriage and swung my sword at Woads as I rode by them. I hit quite a few of them.

I turned Ray to ride through them again. This time I didn't do as well, I was pulled off my horse by a large, well-built Woad, who out-weighed me by a lot.

I was lying on the ground, having the wind knocked out of me, but I quickly jumped up and took a battle stance against the Woad.

He ran at me with a short sword and I easily dodged him. I stabbed him in his leg, which made him even angrier, and he turned around to come at me again. This time I didn't dodge him, but stuck my sword right into his stomach.

This caused him to drop his sword and fall over, but he fell right on top of me. I was trapped under this large, dead, man. All of a sudden all these memories of my step-father being on top of me came back. I started to freak out. I struggled with all my might to roll his body off of me.

Lancelot stood a couple feet away and had just stabbed one of the last Woads, he saw me struggle and let out a little laugh, I mean, it must have looked funny to see me under a monster of a man, unable to get up. He didn't understand how I felt inside though, I was terrified, tears were streaming down my face as I finally rolled the body off of me and jumped to my feet. I held my sword high and stabbed the dead body several times. Lancelot ran up to me and pried the sword from my hands.

"I think he's dead now," he said chuckling. He then saw the shock on my face and the tears rolling down my cheeks. The smile immediately vanished from his face.

"Did he hurt you? What happened? Why are you shaking like that? I told you to stay on the hill!" He looked like he was ready to stab the dead body, too, just like I had. I couldn't say anything I was still staring at the body of the dead Woad. I then closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

"It's nothing…he didn't hurt me…I…I just get a little carried away when I fight…" I said with a chuckle, trying to lighten up the mood, and taking my sword from Lancelot. That really wasn't a very good excuse for why I was crying and shaking all over, and Lancelot didn't buy it.

"Julia…" he said.

But by that time I had turned around and walked towards Rhaebus; who was waiting over by the nearby forest, well away from where all the fighting took place. I wiped the tears from my eyes and took Ray's head in my hands. I kissed his muzzle and he let out a small whinny.

I then mounted up and rode over to where the rest of the knights were talking to, whom I guessed to be, the bishop. The bishop got into his carriage just as I reached it.

"I see you took every fighting technique I taught you to heart, Julia. You did a very good job out there, I am proud of you," Arthur said to me approvingly.

Nothing could have made me forget about that fighting incident faster than him saying he was proud of me. My face lit up with joy and I gave him a huge smile, now he was really like that father I never had.

After Lancelot gave me another worried look, which I ignored, we nudged our horses into a walk and made our way towards Hadrian's Wall.

Ok its getting late now so I am going to stop here….but the next chapters will definitely get more into Lancelot and Julia, and about her troubled past. I might not update until next weekend…I am not sure if I'll get a chance to write during the week (school..ugh…)…but if u guys review that'll keep me motivated to update REALLY soon..and trust me I have some great things in mind for this story! It all came to me in a dream…lol….it was a good dream…it had Lancelot in it! He he ! lol SO keep reviewing and I will update soon!

Phantom of the Opera is a GREAT movie! Go watch it!! Lol…just thought I'd tell you guys! :p


	3. Chapter 3

To ALL reviewers: There are too many to write individual notes to! So I am just going to write to ALL of you!...thank you soo much for reviewing…I didn't plan on getting a chapter out during the week, but thanx to you I did! Lol…expect more chapters on the weekend!..Keep reviewing! I need the motivation to keep writing and you guys are giving it to me!

Chapter 3

I was riding next to Arthur, leading the group, as we approached Hadrian's Wall. The wall looked magnificent. I had spent my whole life in our little village and never had I dreamt of a wall so big or so long. You didn't know where it started or ended, it just disappeared over the horizon.

I was in awe. Arthur noticed this, "It's beautiful, isn't it? Just wait until we get to Rome, it has the finest architecture in all the land."

I smiled just thinking about Rome.

Then Arthur's' face turned serious and he said, "Julia, I have to ask you something, Lancelot told me about what happened on the battle field back there…"

The smile immediately vanished from my face and my body stiffened up. I had hoped he wouldn't find out about my 'ordeal' on the battle field.

"…did your step-father ever do more than just hit you…?"

"No." I answered a little too quickly.

I didn't know why I couldn't tell Arthur about all that my step-father had done to me. I loved Arthur dearly, but I didn't trust him enough to share such a painful memory with him, and that made me feel guilty. This man had adopted me as his own daughter and I couldn't even answer a simple question without lying to him.

"…Julia…please, I only want to help…"

Then suddenly my guilt turned to anger.

"I said no! I already explained to Lancelot what happened back there!" And with that I turned Ray and cantered him toward the back of the group, but not before giving a mean look to Lancelot, who was riding behind Arthur.

The ride into Hadrian's Wall was pretty uneventful. I stayed at the back of the group and kept silent. I was thinking that I would apologize to Arthur, for snapping at him, as soon as we got into the wall.

We rode through the giant gates of the wall and I was amazed. Never had I thought of houses more than one story high or requiring horses to open a gate because it was so huge. I just sat on Ray, mouth open in awe and trying to take all of my surroundings in.

We rode into a little courtyard, where we dismounted our horses. The horses were then taken away by stable boys. Rhaebus didn't like this one bit and fought the young boy all the way to the barn, but he eventually calmed down and let the poor boy put him into a stall.

After I made sure Rhaebus, and the stable boy, were ok I went to find Arthur.

"Arthur, I want to apologize for the way I acted back there…I can't explain…"

"Julia, it's ok, I understand…" he put his hand on my cheek "there's no reason to bring up painful memories at a joyful time like this. I'll have Jols here show you to your room, where you can rest. I'll have him come and get you when the ceremony starts."

I gave Arthur a quick smile and hug and then followed Jols. He showed me to my room and told me that someone would be by shortly with some new clothes for me.

After Jols left I examined the room I was in. It was a very nice room, nicer than I was used to. It had a bed under a huge window, from where you could see Hadrian's Wall. Across from the bed was a vanity table with a huge mirror.

I dared to look in it and was very happy to know that someone would be here with new clothes for me. The beige dress I was wearing was not only torn and dirty; it was also covered with blood from the battle.

Then there was a knock on the door.

"Come in." I said.

A pretty woman, she looked to be in here thirties, with flaming red hair and green eyes walked in.

"Well aren't you something…" she said to me looking me up and down. I wasn't sure whether to take that as a compliment or not.

"…my name is Vanora. Now let's get you cleaned up."

Vanora…I was thinking where I had heard that name before. Then I remembered Bors talking about his lover, Vanora, and the eleven children he had with her.

After taking a quick bath Vanora helped me dry off and slipped a dark green dress over my head and matching shoes on my feet. The dress fit perfectly, and after my hair was brushed and styled, Vanora looked me up and down and seemed satisfied.

"Well aren't you something…" this time I knew she meant it as a compliment.

When I looked in the mirror I let out a quiet gasp. My hair looked silky and the top half of it was tied up in a bun at the back of my head. My face was clean and tendrils of hair hung in my face in a messy, yet sophisticated sort of way. The long green dress I was wearing was gorgeous. The sleeves of the silk dress hung off of my shoulders. It was plain, yes, but it fit me perfectly in all the right places.

Suddenly I was very proud of the way I looked, and when Jols came to pick me up for the ceremony I walked a little straighter, with my head held a little higher than usual.

He led me down a flight of stairs and through a long hallway. At the very end was a huge set of doors.

He opened them and motioned for me to go inside.

I walked into a huge room, with a giant round table in the middle. The table looked as if it could seat around forty people. Many knights must have lost their lives over the years, because now there were only seven seats occupied.

The seven knights rose when I walked in.

"Wow…"

"…well, aren't you a pretty sight…"

…were some of the comments I heard as I walked to sit between Arthur and Lancelot.

Lancelot pulled the chair out for me and whispered in my ear, "I didn't think it was possible for beauty to become even more beautiful."

It wasn't the smoothest line in the world, but I have to admit, it did make me blush.

"Julia, you look absolutely amazing," Arthur said to me with a smile.

I wanted to say something to him, but the huge doors suddenly flew open and a man, who looked like a minister of some sort, walked in. He stopped and announced, with a shocked look on his face, "His Eminence, Bishop Naius Germanius."

With that, the bishop walked in and we all rose from our seats. He had a balding head and a gray beard, he was wearing a very expensive looking robe, and the expression on his face matched that of the other man; shock.

Then I realized why both were so shocked.

"A round table? What sort of evil is this?" whispered the minister-looking man to Jols.

"Arthur says for men to be men, they must first all be equal," replied Jols coolly.

Then I heard the bishop speak for the first time, "I was given to understand there would be more of you."

"There were. We have been fighting here for fifteen years, bishop," said Arthur.

"Oh, of course. Arthur and his knights have served with courage to maintain the honor of Rome's empire on this last outpost of our glory. Rome is most indebted to you noble knights. To your final days as servants to the empire…"

"Day. Not days," Lancelot interrupted the bishop. As we all sat down again, the bishop asked if all the knights had converted to Christianity. Of course Arthur immediately said that each knight retains that religion of their forefathers.

The bishop didn't seem very happy about that.

"Of course, of course. They are pagans. Hm?" he said in an un-approving tone of voice.

The bishop then started to talk to Arthur about his religion and his path to God through Pelagius; it seemed to me that the bishop disagreed with everyone's beliefs, except for his own.

He then told the knights that Rome has decided to remove itself from Britain and leave the land to the Woads and the Saxons, whom were invading from the north. This pretty much meant that Arthur and the rest of the knights had been risking their lives for nothing; this upset me almost as much as it upset them.

What made me dislike the bishop even more was when he didn't want to give the knights their discharge papers. He said he would like a word with Arthur, in private.

"We have no secrets," said Arthur.

The annoyed look on the bishops' face made Lancelot stand up and say, "Come. Let's leave Roman business to Romans."

Lancelot took my hand and I quickly glanced at Arthur. He nodded at me, and I got up and followed Lancelot and the rest of the knights out of the room.

As the knights went into the courtyard, I decided to make my way up to my room.

"Julia, wait…" Vanora ran up behind me.

"…do you think you could help me serve drinks down in the courtyard? Having had eleven children can take its toll on a woman," she said rubbing her back.

I chuckled and told her of course.

We walked down to the courtyard, where all the knights were yelling, throwing knives, playing cards, and especially drinking.

Let's just say I was way out of my comfort zone, but I didn't want to leave Vanora to do this all by herself. I went from table to table and filled up the mugs of the knights and some of the men from the village.

This also gave me a chance to observe Lancelot; not that I liked him or anything, I just felt pulled towards him, for some reason, and I wanted to know more about him.

I was filling up the Bors' mug when I spotted Lancelot, sitting at a table playing cards. Vanora was there asking if anyone wanted another drink. Lancelot grabbed her by the waist and sat her on his lap.

"Ahh. When are you going to leave Bors and come home with me?" he said to her smoothly, kissing her neck.

"My lover is watching you," she said as she got up and lightly slapped Lancelot.

At that point I felt disgusted. Just when I thought Lancelot was something else, he turns out to be a…man…; a womanizing, will-do-anything-to-sleep-with-you kind of man.

Lancelot turned around to laugh at Bors, who also saw the whole thing, but it didn't seem to bother him very much.

Lancelot saw me standing next to Bors and the disgusted look on my face. The smile immediately vanished and he turned around to get back to his card game.

"Ah! Why does he have to be so….so…" I angrily mumbled to myself as I walked over to Galahad and Gawain to fill up there drinks.

I was on my way to the wine-barrel when I felt an arm roughly grab me around the waist and pull me on a lap. At first I thought it was Lancelot, but then I realized it was the man sitting across from Lancelot.

He smelled my hair and whispered in my ear, "A pretty thing like you would look great in my bed tonight."

I jumped up and tore free from his grasp, I quickly grabbed the dagger Lancelot was holding and slammed it down on the seat of the man's chair, where seconds before, if he hadn't moved back, his 'you know what' had been. The man looked at me in horror as the dagger stuck deep in the wood of the chair.

I got close to his face and whispered in his ear, "Touch me, and I won't 'accidentally miss' again."

With that I walked away. I could feel Lancelot's eyes on me the entire time.

When I finally dared to look back, I saw that the man was gone, and Lancelot still staring at me with the weirdest expression on his face, I couldn't tell whether it was admiration or amusement; love or hate. Whatever it was, his eyes were intoxicating and they seemed to follow me everywhere I went, even when he wasn't looking at me.

Author: I wasn't really planning on stopping here….but I want to make all my chapters about the same length. Some things in my story may not make sense..but be patient it'll all come together in the end…but if there is anything that you really don't understand..write it in a review and I will fix it right away! I want to make this story make sense to other people….I mean it all makes sense in my head..but it may not make sense to you….am I making sense?? Lol….alright..I want you guys to know that I write these chapters really fast!..so I don't catch a lot of the mistakes I make…if you find any tell me. What my plan for this story is, is to write all the chapters like I have been, while you guys are giving me feedback on what I am doing wrong or right…then when its done I will make a final complete draft of this story and publish it on fanfiction again…that way I can involve you guys in writing a really good story! Thank you guys again…review…so that the next chapter can be out soon!

PS: I understand my story is moving kind of slow…I promise I'll try to pick it up a little bit.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

I served drinks for about another hour, when I heard Bors yell, "Vanora will sing."

Then many of the knights joined in, "Sing!…Sing!...Sing about home!"

Eventually Vanora gave in and sang, "Land of bear and land of eagle, land that gave us birth and blessing, land that called us ever homewards, we will go home across the mountains, we will go home, we will go home…" and on she went.

As she was singing the song I observed the knights watching her and taking in every word of her song.

Galahad had his eyes closed and was singing along; Lancelot had lost his usual cocky demeanor and was solemnly looking down at his cup; this made me realize how much these discharge papers meant to the knights.

They had been fighting for fifteen long years; never having enough time to start a real family or get married; fifteen years of their lives consisted of fighting, blood, and death.

Fifteen years of pain; physical and mental. Sound familiar? It did to me, it made me think of a young girl who also went through many years of pain…that girl was me. Then I realized why I felt pulled towards Lancelot, we both lived similar lives; but why Lancelot? Why didn't I feel this mental connection with Galahad, Gawain, or any of the other knights? Why didn't I feel such a pull towards Arthur?

I was snapped out of my pondering when Jols and Galahad yelled, "Arthur!"

All the knights, and I, got up and walked over to where Arthur was. I didn't like the serious look Arthur had on his face.

"You're not completely Roman yet, right?" asked Galahad with a chuckle.

Arthur looked from me to the knights and said, "Knights…brothers in arms…your courage has been tested beyond all limits….but I must ask you now for one further trial."

"Drink," interrupted Bors with a laugh.

Arthur continued, "…we must leave on a final mission for Rome before our freedom can be granted…"

Gawain and Galahad thought this to be a joke, or just hoped it was, and started laughing.

Arthur kept going, "…Above the wall, far in the north, there is a Roman family in need of rescue. They are trapped by Saxons. Our orders are to secure their safety."

Bors was starting to get aggravated and, as calmly as he could, said, "Let the Romans take care of their own."

"Above the wall is Woad territory," said Gawain in a shocked voice.

Galahad was extremely drunk, and that wasn't helping the situation at all, "Our duty to Rome, if it was ever a duty, is done. Our pact with Rome is done."

Bors couldn't keep his temper under control any more, and he yelled, pointing at Arthur, "Every knight here has laid his life on the line for you. For you. And instead of freedom you want more blood? Our blood? You think more of Roman blood than you do of ours?"

"Bors…" Arthur replied firmly, but calmly, "…these are our orders. We leave at first light, and when we return your freedom will be waiting for you. A freedom we can embrace with honor…"

"I am a free man!" yelled Bors, "I will choose my own fate!"

Tristan, who usually never said a word, replied coolly, "Yeah, yeah, we're all going to die someday. If it's a death from a Saxon hand that frightens you, stay home."

That was the last straw for Galahad and he yelled at Tristan, "Listen, if you're so eager to die, you can die right now! I've got something to live for!"

Lancelot and I jumped between the two and he yelled, "Enough. Enough!"

I was glad to hear the confident voice of Dragonet, "The Romans have broken their word. We have the word of Arthur. That is good enough. I'll prepare."

Arthur looked at Gawain and said, "And you, Gawain?"

"I'm with you…Galahad as well." Gawain replied. Galahad smashed the mug he had been drinking out of and both walked away.

The only people left standing there were me, Lancelot and Arthur.

Arthur looked at me and said, "I will leave the decision of whether you want to go or not up to you; but I prefer you would come with us, I have lost you once before, and I am not about to lose you again."

I gave Arthur a reassuring smile and said, "I'll go pack." With that Arthur walked away and I was about to go to my room, when Lancelot grabbed my hand.

"Julia, it's far too dangerous, I can't let you come with us, you don't know what the Saxons are like; they will rape and kill any living being…I could never forgive myself if anything happened to you…"

His words made my skin tingle and my heart skip a beat; did he really care for me that much?

I had to ignore them though; there was no way I was going to lose Arthur again. The only time I felt protected and safe was when I was with Arthur.

The only thing I could reply to Lancelot was, "Then you better make sure nothing happens to me."

With that I turned around and quickly walked towards my room, I heard Lancelot give a loud sigh and then walk away in the opposite direction.

When I got to my room I realized that really I had nothing to pack, the best thing for me to do would be to go down to the stables and try to find a saddle and bridle for Rhaebus.

I grabbed my sword and made my way down to the stables. On the way there I stopped by the courtyard and grabbed a canteen and filled it with water.

As I walked into the stables I heard Lancelot's voice.

"Arthur, you fight for a world that will never exist. Never. There will always be a battlefield!"

Lancelot was talking to Arthur; they were obviously in an argument. I wanted to walk away quietly, but both had noticed me and were looking straight at me.

"I was going to get a saddle, but I can see you two are talking, so…uh… I'll just come back later…" I said quietly; turning around to walk away.

Arthur replied quickly, "No, no. Julia it is fine. We were just done discussing tomorrow's mission. I laid a saddle and bridle for you in front of Rhaebus' stall."

And with that Arthur bid me and Lancelot goodnight and walked off towards his room. I walked towards Ray's stall to examine the saddle and attach my canteen and sword. Lancelot was still sitting on a bench, in the back of the stable, silently staring at the ground.

I was just about to go into Ray's stall when Lancelot quietly said, "To try and get past the Woads in the north is insanity…"

I could tell from his voice that this was deeply troubling him. I closed Ray's stall and sat down next to Lancelot. He was still staring at the ground.

"Well, the Woads you've fought before." I quietly said.

"Yes, but not north of the wall…I don't believe in this mission…Suicide cannot be chosen for another!" he was getting very angry; he jumped and started pacing back and forth, still looking at the ground.

I sat quietly, thinking of the right words to say to him.

"Lancelot, I have heard so many tales of you and Arthur about the many battles you've fought together; how many times in battle have you snatched victory from the jaws of defeat? Outnumbered, outflanked, yet still you've triumphed. I know that if Arthur has you by his side, you will be able to do so again. Lancelot…please…"

I got up and grabbed his hand; this finally caused him to look at me and not at the ground.

"…please…come with us Lancelot…if you won't do it for me, then do it for Arthur, your best friend, the one who has fought by your side for so many years."

I was standing right in front of him and he was looking down at me. His gaze got softer with my words and I could see the anger in his eyes fade.

"I'll do it for Arthur…and you." He put the hand I wasn't holding to my cheek and leaned down to kiss me.

I quickly let go of his hand and took a step back. He looked at me with confusion on his face. I turned away and walked towards Ray's stall.

"We…uh…we better get some rest; we've got a long journey tomorrow," I said with a laugh.

I couldn't kiss him, I just couldn't. I was afraid if I kissed him I would develop even stronger feelings for him. During the last day I had experienced so many emotions, some I had never experienced before. Most of my 'growing-into-a-woman' years I was locked in a tiny room; well away from any man I could ever fall in love with. Now that I was slowly falling for Lancelot these feelings scared me, they were overwhelming. I wanted them to go away, yet I longed for them to stay.

I walked into Ray's stall and, as I pet his silky neck, softly spoke to him, "Hey there, how's my boy doing, did you miss me?"

I thought that Lancelot might be upset with me for pulling away from him, but I soon found out he wasn't.

He walked over to Ray's stall door and said with a laugh, "Wow, you can talk to animals!"

I looked at him and said with a smile, "I can talk to you, can't I?"

Note to reviewers: Ok I know my chapters are short…I'll try to make them a bit longer from now on…lets just say I enjoy leaving my readers on the edge! Muhaha! Lol.

Anyway…thank you guys so much for reviewing, keep it up! And I'll make sure to publish another chapter SOON! You see that's another reason my chapters are kind of short…I try to update as soon and as fast as possible…so I write a chapter really fast and update it right away!...but bear with me I usually get a chapter published ABOUT every other night…so it'll be worth the wait for each chapter! Thank you guys soo much! ALL of you!....I'll make sure to update soon, and more will happen in future chapters..I just try to get you to REALLY understand the character and her emotions/feelings…that's why these first few chapters are kind of slow!...but hang in there…I've got a couple twists planned for this story!

Thank you again for reviewing! I am really happy to hear form you guys!

Lots of luv,

Julia


	5. Chapter 5

**_Author's Note: I know I haven't updated in a really long time, which is really not like me. My little sister has been in and out of the hospital for a while now, so please, no flames about me not updating sooner, I had a good reason. I'll try to update sooner from now on. I wrote this chapter pretty quickly so that's why it's kind of short. If there is anything you don't understand in this chapter write it in a review or e-mail me: I will change it, or clear it up right away. I am happy that so many people like and read my story and I want to keep it that way! So here you go: (I hope you enjoy and remember to update!)_**

Chapter 5

I woke up very early the next morning. Even though this mission held almost certain death, I was excited to go.

I went over to the closet that stood in the corner of the room and found nothing but dresses. Now there was no way I was going to fight in a dress.

I walked around the room and looked inside some of the drawers of the vanity table, which was where I found pants. I pulled on the brown leather pants that were way too small for me. I had to lie down on the bed and pull them up with all my might to get them over my hips. Once they were on I stood up, hoping they wouldn't rip, and walked over to the mirror. They fit me pretty well lengthwise, but were very form-fitting on my thighs.

I couldn't find a shirt anywhere, so I took one of the white dresses and cut the bottom off. I looked at myself in the mirror and was satisfied; my pants were too tight, my shirt was cut unevenly, but at least I could fight in these clothes, and who really needed to look good on the battlefield!

I made the bed and walked out of my room towards the stable. All of the knights were already in there. Galahad was warming his horse up and the others knights were sharpening their swords.

"Wow, Julia, you have really tan legs! Put some pants on!" Gawain teased me, looking at my too-tight pants.

I just gave him a playful glare and walked into Rhaebus' stall.

After I got Ray brushed and saddled, I heard the bishop's voice. Apparently the minister-looking man was to accompany us on our quest.

I took Ray out of the stall and was about to mount up when I heard the bishop shout out, "A woman! You're taking a woman on such a holy mission? Taking a woman on a journey as important as this one, will surely lead to disaster!"

I was very confused by this statement; since when are women bad luck! But then I figured that the bishops' strict religion probably had something to do with it.

"She is to stay here with me, I can tutor her in the name of the Holy Father," the bishop said, looking me up and down. I didn't like the tone of his voice at all. How could this man be a man of God!

Arthur didn't seem to like the sound of the bishops' last statement either. "She will come with us. If she doesn't go none of us will," Arthur said in a 'that's-final!' sort of tone.

The bishop was about to reply, but Dragonet and Bors had both gotten up and were menacingly glaring down at him.

Throwing a disgusted look at me, the bishop swung around and quickly walked away.

I let out a small 'sigh' of relief. I had feared for a second that I would be forced to stay with the bishop.

"…and that man calls himself a man of God…" I heard Tristan mumble to himself as I mounted Rhaebus.

I took my sword off of my saddle and attached it to my back. I was then handed a bow and arrows which I attached to the saddle.

The rest of the knights and the minister-looking man got on their horses. We were ready to go. Arthur looked at each one of us and nodded, we all nodded back. He then turned his horse and cantered ahead, with the rest of us following.

As we were galloping away from the wall I took one last look over my shoulder at it. The great wall looked very small from where we were, and I was praying that soon I would see the magnificent wall, in all its glory, again.

We rode our horses at full speed into the night. I was getting worried about Ray, but he seemed to be keeping up. The terrain suddenly changed from never-ending plains to thick dark forest.

We cantered our horses, dodging trees and ducking under branches, through it. Arthur was urging his horse for more speed; I had a feeling that this forest wasn't safe and that Arthur wanted to get us through it as fast as possible.

Suddenly Arthur pulled his horse to a stop. We all followed suit and listened. I could hear movement in the trees all around us. I prayed to God that the noises were made by squirrels or some other forest animals.

Tristan said something about Woads tracking us, when suddenly an arrow flew in front of Arthur's horse. He quickly turned his horse, as did the rest of us, and we galloped in the other direction.

Our escape path was cut off by arrows with strings attached, that were shot into trees, making a sort of wall. **_(Author's note: I wasn't sure how to describe the arrow-rope things, but if you've seen the movie, which I suspect you all have, you'll know what I am talking about. Now back to the story :p )._**

We sharply turned our horses and all of us galloped in different directions. The Woads were succeeding in their plan of confusing us and splitting us up. I urged Ray to jump over some bushes in front of us, but he refused. When I turned him around to run in another direction I saw dozens of Woads blocking our path. They had their bows and arrows raised and pointed at my heart. I didn't know what to do; I sat there in shock and closed my eyes tightly, preparing for death…it never came.

I heard a low whistle. By the time I had the courage to open my eyes again the Woads had disappeared. I heard the knights talking a few yards away from me. I could tell they were just as surprised by the Woads' change of heart as I was.

"Why didn't they kill us?"

"Merlin doesn't want us dead," I heard Arthur say as I rode over to join the rest of the knights.

"Are you alright?" Lancelot asked me. I told him I was fine.

I then realized that he hadn't spoken to me all day. Maybe he was upset at me for not kissing him the night before. I told myself that if he was mad at me it would be for the better, I won't have to worry about my emotions going haywire and me falling madly in love.

After Arthur made sure that everyone was alright we all followed him through the forest in a single-file line. We walked our horses; they needed the break and the Woads seemed to have disappeared.

Lancelot was riding behind me and I could feel his eyes on the back of my head. Every time I turned around to look at him he would avoid my eyes and stare blankly into the forest. I really wish I knew what was going on in his mind.

_**(Authors Note: Alright, well Julia wants to know what is going on in Lancelot's mind, but sadly she is not psychic. Luckily you, the reader, are! So here is Lancelot's POV so you understand why he is acting the way he is. :p).**_

_Lancelot's POV:_

_As we were riding through the forest I was thinking about all that had happened in the last two days. When I first laid eyes on Julia I found her very beautiful and couldn't wait to get her in my bed **(Author's Note: I hope he doesn't sound too 'player-ish' here, but he IS a man and men mainly think about one thing…so please be understanding! Lol). **There was a certain innocence about her that attracted me to her. _

_The very first day as she was struggling under that dead Woad I knew that under her innocent demeanor were horrible and painful memories. Yet on that day the only thing I cared about was getting her to my room. _

_That night in the stables I was so sure I would finally have her. Yet she pulled away from my embrace, shivered at my touch, and stepped away from my kiss. I lay awake all night thinking about her, I was sure I wasn't falling in love with her. She was more of a prize I wanted to win and then abandon. _

_But this morning when I woke up I realized that I can't do that to her. She is the daughter of my best friend. I have been able to have these 'one-night-stands' with women in the past, and it has never bothered me. _

_So as we were riding away from the wall I decided to keep my distance from her, for her own good. I will never be the man to take a wife, if I let myself get too close to Julia I will just end up hurting her. _

_I could tell she was confused by my actions, but I just kept telling myself that it was for her own good, but was it really the best for mine?_

**_Author's Note: Alright I have a lot to write and I hope all of you read it. There is one review by katemary77 (I hope you're not mad that I singled you out :p) that all fan fiction writers need to read. It is a great review with NO flames but constructive criticism, which I like. Alright, first of all, I am centering on the events of the movie, mainly because I know how the characters will act in those events and it's just easier to write (I know I am lazy! Lol). And I did write down direct lines from the movie, I will stop doing that from now on, well I will condense them, because I realize how boring that must get for the readers. I know I made Julia a little too perfect, I tried to give her a little flaw in this chapter (the pants) and I'll try to make her more 'realistic' from now on. One last thing that I think readers may have misunderstood, I know it seemed like Julia and Lancelot fell in love really quickly, but Julia is worried about falling in love, she hasn't yet, and Lancelot, as you have found out in his POV, was only looking to get into Julia's pants (that will change, he will truly care for her in later chapters). So I hope this cleared up a lot of misunderstanding, I appreciate constructive criticism, as long as its not rude, I haven't had a problem with that so far and that makes me really happy. XOXO_**


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

I was so relieved when the dark forest finally opened up again and I could see some daylight. We rode into a large valley with a little village right in the middle of it. I figured that this was the village of the family we were to rescue.

Lancelot rode past me and trotted his horse to ride next to Arthur. He didn't even glance at me as he rode by. I made a mental note to have a talk with him later.

I was at the very back of the group and as I rode up to the village and its large gates, which had been closed just as Arthur rode up, I heard Arthur ask for an Alecto. A boy around my age looked down at us from the large wall surrounding the village.

"I am Alecto," he said.

Apparently this was the son of the 'leader' of the village and also the person we were to rescue. Alecto's father, Marius, wasn't too keen about the idea of leaving the village and immediately refused. None of the knights would get their discharge papers if they didn't bring the family back. Arthur made that clear to Marius, whom eventually gave in to the idea of leaving the village.

I got off of Rhaebus and looked around the outskirts of the village. Many villagers, who had abandoned their work in the surrounding fields, were staring at us in awe. Alecto's father irritably barked at them to get back to work, and some of the village guards shoved the villagers away from us.

"Who is this man, what is his punishment for? Answer me!" I heard Arthur yell. I turned around and was shocked at the scene in front of me:

An old man was tied to three wooden poles that were stuck in the ground at an angle and all touched at the top. It was a sort of tent without the cloth, and the man was tied in the middle with his hands above his head. The man looked to be in his seventies and wore nothing but a small cloth. He was dirty and bloody from being whipped on his back, and I thought that he was dead.

I gave my horses' reins to Galahad and walked over to where Arthur was standing.

"Help this man!" Arthur was yelling at the villagers just as I got there.

I knelt down next to the old man and made sure he was still alive. None of the villagers seemed to want to come near the old man. I put one of his arms over my shoulder and tried to stand up. He was too heavy for me to carry by myself, a woman noticed this and put down the clothes she had been folding and walked over to me. She put his other arm over her shoulder and we both got up. We dragged him towards the gate.

We were only to rescue the family, but Arthur just couldn't leave these defenseless people at the hands of the Saxons. So all the knights, except for Lancelot, were helping the villagers pack.

The woman and I were struggling to carry the old man. We walked towards Lancelot and he didn't even glance at us, he just sat on his horse staring at the ground into nothingness.

As we were walking past Lancelot I looked up at him and, panting from the workout I was getting, said, "It must be a lot easier for you to ignore me, than to help me."

He stared at the ground for a moment longer, and then made the tiniest glance towards me. After that he turned his horse and galloped away to join Arthur.

I was so mad and confused that I forgot about the task at hand and almost dropped the poor, old man. I pulled myself together and with all my strength helped carry the man through the gates and into a cottage inside the village. There the wife of Marius was waiting for us with a bucket of warm water. We put the man on a bed and Marius' wife said she would tend to his wounds and dismissed me and the village woman.

I walked around the outskirts of the village looking for a small pond or something of that sort. I found a small watering trough and washed the dirt and blood off of me the best I could. I had just rinsed my face when I spotted a small, gloomy-looking cabin that seemed to be going into the wall surrounding the village.

I slowly made my way over to it. I was right in front of it and could have sworn that I heard a distant scream come from behind the door just seconds before. I pulled the door open and was about to step into the darkness of the cabin when an elderly man jumped out of the cabin and grabbed me by my shoulders.

He pushed me away from the door of the cabin and started shaking me ferociously and yelling things like, "…You have disrupted this holy sanctuary!...You are the devil's child!...You have come to awaken evil spirits!..."

The man looked like an evil spirit, if I may say so. He had white hair and was completely bald in random places on his head, he was missing more than half of his teeth and one of his eyes was bulging out of his head. I was terrified and disgusted. He had the smell of death to him and the look of it too.

He threw me on the ground and started sprinkling 'holy water' on me and was chanting hysterically. He then grabbed my shoulders again and pulled me to my feet, I was under too much shock to fight back to any of this. He started shaking me and yelling, "I will shake this evil spirit out of you! Holy father, bring your glory upon this spawn of Satan and free her of this curse!"

This man was going crazy; he was shaking me very hard and yelling horrible things about me at the top of his lungs. My vision was getting blurry. Suddenly I saw a dark figure run towards us, and the next second I was lying on the ground. I shook my head to regain proper sight and keep my consciousness. I looked at what had happened and I saw Lancelot on top of the crazy man beating him with his fists.

The man had been knocked out cold, but Lancelot still kept beating him. Bors jumped off his horse and pulled Lancelot off of the man. Lancelot was breathing hard and sweat was pouring down his forehead.

I got up slowly, my legs still shaking slightly. Lancelot shot me an accusing look, roughly broke free of Bors' grasp and quickly walked away. I was very confused at that moment. Not so much by the crazy mans' weird behavior, but by the way Lancelot was acting. He had looked at me as if it was my fault that he had beaten up the elderly man. And it may have been, but I didn't ask him to help me!

Arthur was running towards me, "Julia, are you alright?"

"Yes, yes, I'm fine. Just a little shaken, that's all," I replied.

He took my face in his hands and examined my eyes and face closely, to make sure no harm had been done. I had a couple of scrapes, but that was it.

I gently pushed him away and said, "I am fine, I promise. I am not so sure about Lancelot, though."

"Oh, he's fine. I've known him for a long time and this isn't the first time that he has secluded himself after a fight," Arthur said, putting a hand on my shoulder.

"Well I better go and thank him," I said walking in the same direction Lancelot had gone.

I spotted him standing by the water trough I had washed my face in earlier. He was staring at his reflection in the water. I walked over to him and when I stood next to him he quickly leaned down and splashed water on his face, trying to avoid eye contact.

I cleared my throat and said, "I wanted to thank you for helping me back there, I…"

"It was nothing; I would have done it for anyone," he interrupted me with a cold tone in his voice.

_**(Authors Note: Alright, I want all my readers to understand why the line 'I would have done it for anyone' hurts Julia so much. If you can remember in Chapter 4 Julia is trying to convince Lancelot to go on this mission and he says that he will do it for her (and Arthur), now all of a sudden it's as if Julia is nothing to Lancelot, he would have helped anyone in her situation, and that might be true, but it's still very hurtful the way Lancelot tells Julia this.)**_

I was very hurt by the way Lancelot was talking to me. I liked it better when he ignored me completely. Now he treated me as if I had some sort of disease he didn't want to get. I didn't understand this man at all. How can a person change so suddenly, was it all because of that stupid kiss I didn't give him! I couldn't take it anymore I just had to find out why he was acting the way he was.

I tried to keep my temper under control and quietly asked, "Did I do something wrong, because you're sure acting like it?"

He didn't answer. He just started at his reflection in the water trough.

"See? This is what I am talking about, you act as if I'm not even there; you act as though you don't want me around!" My temper was getting the better of me.

"That's not true," he said quietly.

"Yes, yes it is true! Look at yourself! Even now, you care more about staring into a dirty water trough than listening to me!"

"That's not true," he said a little louder this time.

"Oh, Lancelot, I am sick of this! Just tell me what I did or what I didn't do that upset you so much! Or even better, just tell me that you don't give a damn about me or my feelings!" I was yelling at him now. Angry tears were stinging at the corners of my eyes, but I refused to let them fall.

I could tell my words finally hit something in Lancelot's mind because he looked away from the water trough and finally made eye contact with me.

He looked angry and hurt and said to me in a loud voice, "That's not true that I don't want you around! What is true is that I care a damn of a lot about you and your feelings! In fact that is the reason I am acting this way around you! Don't you get it, Julia! I don't want you to get hurt! You have no idea how hard it is for me to distance myself from you, and now you're trying to make it even harder!"

I felt touched, shocked, angry, relieved, and hundreds of other emotions after Lancelot told me this. It all seemed to make sense now. I was angry at myself for not figuring it out, and then again I was still angry at him. I couldn't reply anything to that. We stood there and looked at each other for the longest time. I was going over what he told me in my head, and while I was thinking about it and looking at him, a tear escaped from my eye.

Lancelot's voice was soft and quiet this time, "Oh, Julia, no, please…don't cry…" He moved his hand towards my face to wipe away the tear, but I stepped back and wiped it away myself.

I stood up a little straighter and said in a strong voice, "No, Lancelot, it's fine. You're right; this is the right thing to do. This is the best way for neither of us to get hurt."

With that I walked away. If distance from Lancelot was supposed to keep me from getting hurt, it wasn't working. The farther I walked away from him the more I wanted to scream, because of the intense pain I felt inside my heart.

**_Authors Note: Alright, I decided to end it here. I didn't want to leave Julia in the dark too long about why Lancelot was acting like an a. Now that their feelings are out in the open we can finally get to the REAL romance…he he. I know all of you want to see Julia and Lancelot together, but trust me on this one, the longer I keep this 'passion-gap' between the two, the more beautiful it will be when the two are finally together. I won't keep them apart for too much longer, so bear with me. The next chapter will hold quite a bit. Firstly Guinevere will come into the picture, she is a Woad, and all of you know what Julia thinks about Woads. That will be interesting. And Arthur has a secret to tell Julia that will make her very angry with him. While Julia and Arthur have this little conflict going on, guess who will be there to comfort Julia? _**

**_Ok I just wanted to give you guys a little 'sneak-peek' of the next chapter which I still have to write and will come out shortly if you guys keep reviewing the way you are! XOXO_**


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